Knowing our Triggers, Loving Our Selves, TROML Baby!

1Keep your finger on the trigger…

What do I mean by that? Actually, I’m an advocate for gun control. My intention was to get your attention.

We all have triggers. Once again, it’s a part of our human experience. We come into this world in an imperfect state and we leave—hopefully a little wiser—adding value and supporting other humans in this world.

Well, that’s the goal anyway. If you have had the experience of becoming a parent, you bring this beautiful baby into the world and pray that they are perfect in every way: physically, mentally and spiritually. You want perfection. If you are fortunate enough to have a child that is physically perfect, you find yourself staring at your child and thinking: “this is it”! I have reached perfection myself through giving birth to this perfect human.

2The reality is this, we all have scars. There is no such thing as a perfect human. Some people wear their scars on the outside, others carry them on the inside. So, soon you will find that this perfect looking baby you have, has imperfections. I have seen parents devastated when their own “perfect” child does something wrong, or hurts another child intentionally. It’s part of the plan. None of us are perfect at all; nor, will ever be. We have people doing wonderful things every day. Those same people can do harm. How is that possible?

We have to accept that we as humans are constantly struggling. Some days are lovely, beautiful and filled with joy. Other days are not. We can be hopeful for periods of time, and then something, someone or a tragedy comes along, out of our control which literally, “rocks our world view”.

These are the triggers I am talking about. Some of us know what our triggers are, and others don’t know, or may never know.

3People with allergies learn—sometimes the hard way—that there are certain foods that cause triggers. If you have ever had an allergic reaction, you understand what I am talking about. Depending on the severity of the reaction—most folks with allergies will learn very quickly to stay away from these allergens. Sometimes, it’s darn impossible, depending on the food, environment or allergen you are trying to avoid. Then, other times, we knowingly head right into trouble, even though we know the consequences.

However, even if you are one of the lucky people who don’t suffer from allergies, there are plenty of other triggers out there that will stomp you down. These triggers are in the form of people, places and things. Experience is what teaches us; however, since we are human and fallible, we can’t seem to avoid these triggers. Sometimes it’s intentional on our parts, sometimes we have no control whatsoever.

Some of these uncontrollable triggers are: loss of loved ones through distance or death, break-ups, loss of any “thing” that you held near and dear. There are negative people, even places and things that we know we should stay away from because they are not good for us, but we have these moments of weakness, even amidst moments of strength. It is amazing how quickly something positive can turn negative. Affairs of the heart can cause us to spiral out-of-control into these triggers of sadness, loneliness and anxiety which can lead to despair, depression and long term acute illnesses, both mental and physical.

4I think there is power in knowing what these triggers are and how they affect us. We don’t have complete power over any of them, but we can look for support through a variety of tools, including friends, family and organizations.

I think the key is the old Boy Scout motto: “Be prepared”. Or, another way of saying it is forewarned is forearmed. This awareness doesn’t solve all of the problems of the world, it won’t even solve all of your problems. But, if you take the time to know yourself, and your triggers, you have a much better chance of not only surviving when negative triggers are present, but thriving, and helping others deal with their triggers.

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